Two Good Moves

What’s up, Willie here again. Let me start by saying it’s a very good thing we didn’t lose on Sunday. I’m not sure what would have happened if we were swept, but thanks to David Wright’s Grand Slam and some other stuff that happened later on while I was resting my eyes, that’s a moot point.

Funny story about that homer. You, as the average fan, probably didn’t know this, but as manager I put the play for the Grand Slam on. Don’t ask me what the signs are or the details of the process (because I don’t really remember stuff like that). Anyway, I relayed the signs to David via Julio Franco, and then BOOM, there it goes on the next pitch. For some reason, David didn’t give me credit for this play in his post game interview, and I decided to confront him about this. Because I’m trying to give you Mets fans a better understanding of the atmosphere in my clubhouse, I’ve included a brief piece of the conversation:

Me: Yo, Turtle.
DW: Me?
ME: Do you like not batting 9^th?
DW: What? That’s the pitchers spot.
ME: If you don’t shape up, El Duque and you will switch spots in the batting order.
Cliffy Baseball: Do you smell bacon?

That’s when I walk into my office and find two buttermilk pancakes, two eggs, two bacon strips and two sausage links, plus hash browns, a small glass of juice and coffee. I then realized why David thought he did nothing wrong; turns out the homerun was just coincidence.

On another note, El Duque is now unofficially the team hitting coach. It does unfortunately distract him from his pitching responsibilities. Sometimes he gets caught up showing the guys how to properly throw a bat down the third base line (I hope you were watching, Julio!), and then he’s not prepared to face certain hitters and gives up a long ball, but that’s the price to pay for a top notch hitting instructor.

The final remark for the night will be another brief explanation of why I’m such a brilliant manager. Once I realized Arroyo was shutting us down, I told the team to stop trying to hit, let him throw a complete game, and just watch. You see, I’ve been watching a lot of world cup games recently, and I’ve figured out that run differential is very important for our playoff seeding. As a result, my masterful plan means that we’ve seen Arroyo for nine full innings and only lost by two when we had no chance of winning, but now we'll be able to crush him when we play the Reds again later on this year – meaning, I’m a genius.

Okay, Mets fans, I’m in a surprisingly not so bad mood after things didn’t work out again tonight. But lookout, things will go downhill if we don’t finish this homestand strong. Let’s go Mets!