It's All in the Family

What’s up Mets fans, Willie here. Back in NY after an awesome performance in Pittsburgh – we may have been swept in the series, but I’m talking about something else. Jim Tracy and I have a long running rivalry from back in the day when we were rookies on the PBA tour. So while I’m a little disappointed about our baseball performance, I’m very happy to say there was no competition Saturday when our teams headed out to the local Holiday Inn Lanes. Not to brag, but I’m an awesome bowler (I average a score somewhere between 1550 and 1600) and am just as awesome regardless of how many Johnny Walker Blacks I’ve had.

But back to baseball. Many of you suspect that something is up. How could we have been swept by the lowly Pirates? They were the first NL team to sweep us this season, so something doesn’t seem to add up. As you may have guessed, I am responsible for this. Let me tell you the story and I’m sure you’ll understand.

Lo and behold, the explanation will start with a very hot topic these past few weeks: the magic number. As I’m sure you all know, we’ve been stuck on one for quite a while. Well, when we got to one I was all ready for some champagne. However, Tommy Glavine explained to me that we need to get to zero, and we won't clinch no matter how many times I yell Uno! at the other team.

So the magic number is still one, and guess who wears that number. Anderson Hernandez. Why does he deserve so many magic number days? Here’s why. Recently, his dads, Orlando and Roberto, have been going through some tough times. I know what a bad situation with fighting parents can do to a youngster, so I’ve shown the size of my heart and tried to help Anderson out. I’m not sure how old Anderson is, but he’s just a little bit older than David Wright, which puts him in those volatile late adolescent years.

In any case, I hope all works out with the Hernandezs. I don’t want to see this off field trouble make its way on to the mound. Maybe I tell them to consult a marriage counselor - and their very own battery mate, Paul LoDuca – for some help.

Don’t worry, Mets fans, we’re going to clinch soon. I promise. Even if I have to send Endy on a mission down the turnpike to take care of business, it will definitely get done.