Willie's World

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

O Canada, O Canada

What’s up Met fans, Willie here. I apologize for the lack of updates, but my free time was just sucked away in Toronto. I mean, Canada is such a fantastic place to visit, and now that I’m in the National League and Montreal has been banned from having a baseball team, I don’t get to visit very often. (I personally think this is such a shame, but who would have thought that NAFTA had a clause in it banning baseball in French speaking providences effective ten years after the signing date?) Anyway, I’ve been so busy sightseeing I’ve barely had time to manage, never mind write. On top of the sightseeing, I also spent a lot of time doing my new Subway commercial. It took waaayy longer than expected because they wanted me to talk in a Canadian accent, but we finally got it done when I convinced them to just do a voiceover using my cousin’s voice, who happens to be two-thirds Canadian.

As far as baseball goes, we had a decent series, thanks mainly to my new favorite shortstop that happens to be on fire at the plate, Chris Woodward. I honestly can’t remember if he played, but he finally did teach Jose Reyes how to hit – this was supposed to be El Duque’s job, but I wasn’t satisfied with his progress so I gave Chris the assignment. I’m so proud of my job delegation skills. I really don’t remember much else from the series as I took frequent naps, a result of the non-baseball activities I already mentioned.

Lastly, we’re in Beantown now, and I’m super excited. As much as I’d like to be out on the town, I am sadly sitting in my hotel room thinking about my strategic maneuvers for the series. This job requires intense and constant dedication, and I’m willing to give that kind of dedication every once and a while.

Okay, I’m going to hit the sack as soon as I finish making up the signs for the new reverse squeeze play I just invented. This series should be thrilling, and the nights of celebration even more so. Let’s go Mets!


  • At 9:05 AM, Anonymous Joe T. Bronx, NY said…

    Willie what was the REAL story on Saturday's game. Did you have a brain fart when you went to the mound the second time or, did you do it on purpose so the umps would kick "EL PUKEY" so you didn't have to? I'm dying to know!!!

  • At 11:46 AM, Blogger Toasty Joe said…

    I second that emotion. I was expecting a long, detailed explanation about this, Willie. Spill it!

  • At 11:52 PM, Anonymous "El Profesor" Reyes said…

    Sit Chris Woodward, and start josé valentín, por favor!

  • At 3:33 PM, Anonymous Lastings Milledge said…

    Can I play 2nd base?

  • At 5:13 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Sure why not? You sure as hell can't play left field!

  • At 11:19 AM, Anonymous MetsRule said…

    Lastings Milledge doesn't make errors. He just needs to let the ball win sometimes. The Mets are letting the Red Sox win so they can get a bigger lead over the Yankees. That's all. Lastings was just being a good team player by helping the cause.


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