Nice Win I Think

What's up Mets fan. Solid win by us today I think. To be honest, I can't be sure because I fell asleep for most of the game, taking what Jose Valentin calls a "sexy siesta". By the time I woke up, the game was long over, and hitting coach Rick Down told me we won. I always enjoy surprises like that.

After last night's game, Pedro Martinez told the media how he did not think he himself had actually lost, and said that he had done more than enough to win. Of course, after these selfish remarks, I had to pull Pedro aside today and talk to him. I let him know in no uncertain terms that comments like these are bad for the team, and that everything we do publicly and privately should be intended to promote team unity and to secure a world championship at the end of the year. I told him to follow my example. I endorse Subway (where you can always eat fresh) because I want our players to have the best nutrition, and I hope to soon sign an endorsement deal for Viagra because uh, you know, a satisfied team is a happy team. Of course, Pedro felt bad about what he had done after I explained it to him like this, so I told him that if he wanted to make up for it, he could conduct a secret undercover investigation and find out if David Wright was actually the one who told on me to the MLB people about my blog, as I strongly suspect. (I had earlier assigned Endy Chavez to conduct the investigation, but due to the language barrier, he misinterpreted my remarks, and hit David Wright in the back with his bat instead. This was the real reason for his "back spasms" that kept him out of Friday's game.) Pedro agreed to look into this, and I'll let you guys know what he finds.

I always like to circle up with my players before they leave the clubhouse, to keep them pumped and focused. Today, I spoke at length with Billy Wagner, and asked him if his arm was feeling strong. He responded with a question, asking "Does a striped bull moose bark like a firefly?". I had no idea what he was talking about, and considered sending Endy Chavez on another investigation, but by the weird smile Billy had on his face, I guessed he meant that his arm was indeed feeling strong. Look for Billy to make a start in the coming week.

Okay guys, it's time for me to hit the hay as we have another early afternoon game tomorrow. Let's go Mets!